Thursday, March 26, 2009

Celebrities + Green Consciousness = REALLY?

Mind you, I have NEVER written a post about a beauty product - yet, these keep on coming:

Eco-Friendly Beach Bag Essentials! (Because, you know, Green is trendy...)

Hey!

(Friendly and informal? Or just trying to avoid the all too inevitable "Dear {WRONG NAME}"?)


Looking for the perfect ‘do this summer? Take a cue from award-winning actress Kate Hudson who always rocks perfectly disheveled, beachy waves.

Now it’s her hair care line with partner and friend David Babaii that is winning awards. The eco-friendly, cruelty free line - David Babaii for WildAid - has got your reader covered with award-winning products that will help them achieve all the top summer looks, from beachy waves to an uber-bouncy curls, these beach bag essentials will have you looking hot all summer long!

(It's going to take a lot more than hair care to make ME look hot, especially in the summer.)


To get sizzling hot-weather locks follow these simple steps:

1. Wash with DBWA Amplifying Shampoo and Conditioner, which were named “Best Green Hair Care” in InStyle Magazine’s 2009 Best Beauty Buys.

2. Spray your whole head with the DBWA Bohemian Beach Spray, which is a finalist in the CEW 2009 Beauty Insiders Choice Awards (winners announced May 1, 2009).

(OK. I just HAD to find out wtf "Beach Spray" is. According to the website - which has one of the most annoying Flash interfaces I've ever seen - it's a "non-aerosol styling spray." I guess the thing that makes it "beach-y" is that it contains both Dead Sea salt and Pacific island volcanic ash. Not sure how that helps you style your hair. Also not sure how that relates to "eco-friendly" if that stuff has to be imported to wherever the hell it's manufactured.)

3. Scrunch or twist sections before drying or allowing to air dry.

4. To set it all in place, lightly spray your hair with DBWA Mise en Plis Extra Hold Styling Spray, which New Beauty magazine honored with a 2009 Reader’s Favorite.

(So they're not serious about calling this a "beach" look, right? Unless you don't plan to actually go in the water or get near the sand.)

Better yet – all of the award-winning products are under $12.99 (!!!) so both your beach bag and your wallet win!

(This may be my favorite part of this pitch, because of those three exclamation points. I guess the Beverly Hills-based publicist who sent this to me is used to spending $30 a bottle on hair care products - but I - and my readers - tend to shop at discount stores, $12.99 will buy you a whole liter.)

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Major Marketing #FAIL

So every now and again (okay regularly), as we all do, I get these pitches from PR firms telling me it behooves me to promote their product---uncompensated--on my blog. I'm iffy enough about it 99.9% of the time, but won't do it unless I LOVE the product already or it pays/compensates and I love it. So that means 99.9% of the time I read the pitches & click delete.

So yesterday one of the PR flacks sends me a SHAME ON YOU---YOU NEVER REPLIED note to me.

She's asking me to promote fabric softener (when I strive for green products) and put up widgets on my blog and tell others to grab the widgets and write up the fabric softener for...a $2 off coupon---for the readers, not me! I don't even remember the original pitch---it was while I was out of town so I probably barely skimmed and deleted.

I'm reading through email the morning, trying to catch up, and I find this "I wrote to you last week and never heard back, so I wanted to remind you about your opportunity to write about blah blah blah..."

Excuse me?

She's CHASTISING me for IGNORING an unsolicited pitch about her product that benefits me NONE?

WTF...the nerve.

I wrote back politely and said, "I do sell ad space on my blog and I am for hire as a web content creator or copywriter. If you would like to buy space or discuss my freelance rates, I'd be very glad to talk about that.

As for not replying, please understand that I receive many requests to advertise products for free on my blog or do free/uncompensated reviews and promotions. Because this is how I earn my living---even if they are great products----I'm unable to reply to all requests of that nature."

GAH...these people, some never learn.

We need a wall of shame---by which I really mean a divided wall of "this is bad" and "this is good" for these people to refer to. And...i need to let this go LOL.